This post had been on my mind for quite some time and after many discussions with other moms I am thinking there are other out there who can relate…
I am a working mom. I spent 4 years at Hope College and am spending 15 years paying it off so staying home full time with my kids just doesn't make sense. My husband is also self-employed so for the time being I need to carry health insurance. I currently work 4 days a week which most weeks is way too much.
Going on a limb here I know men don't really read this so I am speaking to the women...if you work do you ever feel like the load is overwhelming at times? Let me preface by saying my husband is a HUGE help around the house and an amazing dad but some days I feel like the burden is all on me to be a good mom, a valuable employee and run a household. I think sometimes we put this burden upon ourselves but that is another blog post. I feel like I work 24 hours a day (which with a 3 month old, I do). As moms we get up, get the kids ready for the day, tend to all their needs which usually includes many battles, drop off at daycare-deal with the "I don't want to go today" meltdown, get in to work (late), work a full day on 4 hours of sleep (drink lots of Diet Coke), pick up the kids from daycare and listen to the before dinner meltdown on the way home, get home set your stuff down and immediately start making dinner, realize that between the baby screaming and the three year old whining simultaneously the kids are HUNGRY, attempt to cook dinner (which needs to be healthy and planned out) by shushing baby near the stove, trying not to singe their feet, finally sit down for dinner with a baby on the boob. After dinner its clean up time but the kids are still whining because after all you worked all day and they want YOUR attention (valid point from them). Have some playtime then bathtime. Did I mention I am still wearing my high heel boots because I haven't had time to take them off yet? After bath its finally bedtime, go into the three year olds room 10 times for water, kleenex, her feet are cold, the blankets aren't laying right, and the list goes on. Baby is fussy tonight because I have no idea what his day was like..is he over tired, over stimulated? Just needs to snuggle? Who knows..he is finally asleep at 9:30. Then its time to pick up the tornado of a house, empty the dishwasher, fold laundry and unpack from the day and repack for tomorrow. 10:30 p.m.. Ahhhh time to sit down for a few minutes and enjoy time to myself...oh wait hubby needs some attention too. Crawl into bed dead tired and start the day all over again. Can anyone relate?? And this is just a normal day...not taking into consideration what happens when the kids are sick and as moms we are the ones who need to call in to work and figure out how things will get done there and how you can stay home and snuggle so your kids feel like they are more important than anything else in your life. So you ask...is it worth it?
Some days I wonder. Just coming off 9 weeks of Maternity Leave I can fully understand why moms stay home. It’s nice, it’s comfortable. You can decide if it’s a bad day to just have a jammie day with the kids. If your kids are sick you are not going to leave your employer hanging or try to juggle who is going to stay home today with your husband when you both have work to do. And then there is the mommy guilt...I should be spending these days with my kids. Would I love to stay home with my kids full time? Some days yes! Working and being away from your kids is bittersweet. While I miss my children very much during the day I also enjoy having a little break from them and having some adult time. Some time to use my brain in other ways than changing diapers and playing house. Don't get me wrong those things are very important but I think it’s good to be apart for a time so they can develop healthy relationships with others. I also want my kids to be socialized, to learn that their world is not just about them. To learn how to share, how to get along with other kids and to make friends, daycare provides this opportunity. I work in Early Childhood and see the importance of kids having socialization outside of the home before getting to Kindergarten. In the end, yes it’s worth it. I am able to provide the extra funds so we can do fun things as a family and while I do that my kids are learning valuable life skills.
Don't think I am complaining about my life..I love it and feel so blessed. I have an amazing husband who works very hard and I realize his days are often more stressful than mine. And my children...they are the most incredible blessing. I love them with every ounce of my being which I think is where the struggle comes from. We want to provide for them and be everything to them which in turn leads to exhaustion. But I wouldn't trade it for anything. Life is good, most days chaotic but we survive and know that in the end my kids know they are loved beyond measure…thats what is most important.
Sleep: He sleeps about 10-11 hours at night. Usually goes down around 8:30,gets up for s snack around 4:00 and then goes back down until 7:30
